Nature Based: Science, Healing, Balanced
Service Based: The Advancing Of Humanity
Conscious Based: Mono-Mythology
It’s been a while since I blogged about the occult, so here I am. When I was at the crossroads of where I wanted to go, I actually stayed stuck there for a while. It wasn’t about trying to find what I was interested in, as you know I love everything Black Magick and linked into the occult somehow. The main problem I found was trying to find authors and ideas that shared my view on black magick. I’m not really one of those who actually believes that Satan is a taker of souls in a little red suit, but represents different aspects of our own personalities in the form of mythology. Then it hit me, the only reason I want to explore spirituality is to get creative inspiration from it and become a master of my own thoughts, in short, my consciousness was my spiritual path. This got me thinking, so why does Black Magick call to me?
When I took a step back it seemed that each path has it’s own goal, depending what you want out of the experience. I was always a fan of Witchcraft and in all reality wanted modern paganism to be my main focus. Although witchcraft does have a shit load of exploring the mind, it seemed that most of these paths were more concerned with nature. This path was geared towards people who want to study nature, science, health, and the ability to live in harmony with nature. Since there was so much focus on becoming a healer, this just didn’t fit, I’m much too narcissistic and selfish for this kind of study. Other paths seemed to be more service based, to help humanity reach it’s ultimate goal of enlightenment to make the world a better place. Truth be told, just the thought of helping out humanity makes me cringe in bitterness because I just don’t like society in general, nothing personal, I just have a hard time devoting myself to helping people out and not getting anything in return. I believe this is the book based religions who’s mantra is “Thy will be done”, a path of service for God.
If the path of service is “Thy will be done”, I tend to lean more towards the Left Hand mantra of “My will be done”. This is where I fit and honestly was excited and bummed at the same time. You see, I would love to be a beautiful, healing, earth based occultist who understood the natural order of things or to feel compelled to help humanity in the service of God. When I tried this out, it felt unnatural and just plain backwards, so why the fuck does this feel wrong? I had to come to terms that my spiritual path was based off of consciousness and mono-mythology, or the spiritual enlightenment of my own mind. My true calling was to explore the darkest regions I could find in my mind and reach for artistic and creative inspiration. I could say ultimately, this could help humanity and others do the same, but my main drive was to understand myself.
I do believe that everyone does experience all three and that all three play a role in your development, but it seems that one will dominate your spiritual path and the others follow based on that goal. This little piece of insight helped me understand why I study Black Magick and also keeps me in check so I don’t become the next paranoid religious freak. So now, my compass is directed towards Black Magick to gain insight of my own mind for creative expression by using dark gods and goddesses to act as a metaphor to create my own personal mythology. This will be the foundation to the other paths, the path of service to help others like me and an earth based path to begin the healing processes. Now I ask you guys, what is the dominant purpose of your spirituality and what path did you take?